Monday, June 21, 2010

Excuse Me, I'm Looking for Some "Crème de la Crème"? Why Yes, We Have That Right Here...

If this isn't the absolute epitome of
"crème de la crème," I don't know what is.
In fact, if you look up "crème de la crème" in
Misfit Mimes' Weirlandian Dictionary, this is the picture
next to the definition (I thoughtfully included pictures in case
Evan needs to, you know, look stuff up, like "mongoose").

(Note: While my thoughts and prayers are very much quietly with the Weir and Moore families this week, as they gather to celebrate the life of Johnny's grandfather, Robert Moore, who passed away last Friday, my über-stan-ness and sense of humor remain here on the blog, where there are still awards over which to squee and more voting to be done and upcoming performances for which to sell kidneys in order to be able to afford to attend ... )

Well, finally last Thursday the whole world learned from the NewNowNext Awards what all JWe fans know from the moment they are struck by the lightning that is Johnny Weir: He is completely and wholly addictive. On the ice or off; dressed up or down or not at all; speaking with great care or entirely off the cuff accompanied by drug references and raised middle finger; teasing and laughing with his family and friends or spending quiet time alone (save for the camera)--it's all crack to us, and we love-love us some Johnny crack.

So thank you, NewNowNext people, for grasping that Johnny Weir is in fact the Most Addictive Reality Star/Man/Human/Life Force on the planet and thus nominating him so that we could vote to the edge of insanity for him so he could win and we could feel really good about ourselves and our addiction that we have absolutely no intention whatsoever of giving up. Ever. Yay NNN! Yay us! And most of all, yay Johnny!

(But BB, I have to ask: What was this nonsense on the red carpet before the show [around marker 9:30] where you were murmuring that you would probably come in third thanks to all two of your fans who voted for you ...? Please don't make me pull out my charts and graphs again. Nobody wants that. For a moment there I thought you went all square-root-of-four-is-rainbows on me, but then I heard you compare Evan to Britney [and of course at first I thought you meant Brittany from Glee, which brings me back to math and rainbows, and then I could see that you clearly recognize that you are so NOT either Britney or Brittany, but Evan kinda is, and so everything was OK again!]. And you are aware that literally hundreds/possibly thousands of us tweeted and voted for you? You know that, right? OK. But just in case, charts in plastic sheet protectors will be mailed later ... oh hell. THAT'S what I should have done for your birthday scrapbook: A page of voting-statistics charts! Encased in lovely, smooth, clear plastic, with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser stapled to the page just for fun. Well, maybe next year.)

My favorite tweet of the NewNowNext evening, from @BWEtvMichelle: Johnny Weir arrived via cloud sent from heaven's angels #nnna.

Mmmmm sigh ... I believe that's also how all the fans who attended Skate for Hope this past Saturday saw him arrive as well, judging from my e-mail.

Anyway, now that that's over with and we are all on the same glitter-covered page here with Johnny's NNN trophy as our centerpiece, we are faced with:

A random French phrase.

Which is not a thing to be taken lightly. Especially when so many French words involve letters that are there only for decoration ("beaux" = "boze"), or include "r's" that are articulated in a strangled, crunchy manner in the back of your throat, as if you just partially swallowed a mouthful of thumbtacks but are trying valiantly to play it off and keep talking and hope no one notices while said tacks remain lodged just above your windpipe. Like how I talked when I met Johnny. (Who, BTW, speaks French beautifully, of course.)

Here is our French lesson for the week:

Crème de la crème: noun. From the French, literally, "cream of the cream" : the very best : the highest elite.

As a boy who will always call Amish country "home," Johnny may know that when you milk a cow, the cream is the wonderful, rich, frothy part that rises to the very top of the bucket--the best of the best. And it stays there no matter how much the USFSA tries to smush it back down to the bottom or ignore it or pretend that it isn't the one thing that people really, really want. Like crack.

So the analogy couldn't be more apt, and that's where our happy addiction is taking us next: To Crème de la Crème 2010 in Detroit! THIS WEEKEND!

Yes, I know. It isn't a lot of time to auction off the children on eBay, and also "crème de la crème" and "Detroit" in the same sentence may seem at first glance a bit like "elegance" and "Silent Hill." Or perhaps "caviar" and "Chernobyl." But I've gotta give Detroit a lot of points for sheer gutsiness, and for creating and hosting such an extraordinary event in an area that has seen more than its fair share of hard times. Again, it's a perfect metaphor for much of what is so inspiring about Johnny: The will to rise from the ashes--more than once--and create something new and captivating and utterly brilliant.

So what exactly is Crème de la Crème 2010?

It's a haute couture runway fashion show.

On ice.

And its headliner is Johnny Weir.

I repeat: It's the two artistic pursuits about which Johnny is most passionate, and he's the star of the show. And the event will feature some of his own designs alongside those of Jenny Packham of London, Rosa Clara of Barcelona, and David Tutera of My Fair Wedding.

Whoever thought of this whole idea and then invited Johnny deserves their own award. So I'm giving them one: The first-ever Binky, which is an overall-clad and somewhat sadly misshapen Play-Doh statuette (certainly an item anyone who loves haute couture would treasure), for Lifetime Achievement in Creating a Perfect Trifecta of Absolute Johnny-ness to Which the Only Proper Fan Response is OMGIDIE and Where Do I Buy Tickets (OK, I'm still working on the title. But the statue is coming along nicely).

I am so excited about this three-day event--which includes a skating seminar with Johnny on Saturday; a special black-tie, VIP screening of the season finale of BGJW on Sunday; performances by Johnny on Sunday and Monday INCLUDING "POKER FACE," plus skating by Detroit's own 2009 US National Champion Alissa Czisny--that I'm going to be blogging about it all week in between trips to my local plasma center where I, too, can sell my blood for cash.

In the meantime, I encourage you to please become a fan of Crème de la Crème 2010 on Facebook, follow them on Twitter, and visit their website for all the info on scheduling and tickets. Yes, it's pricey--but I think it's going to be among the highlights of Johnny's post-Olympic events this year.

Because the exotic Crème de la Crème 2010, and the charities it benefits in battered, beaten-down-but-defiant Detroit, is the perfect event in the perfect venue to illustrate one of my all-time favorite Johnny Weir quotes: "Out of ugly ... make something beautiful."

Check out Johnny's new blog on SUNFiltered!
He'll be posting entries there all week
leading up to the BGJW finale this Sunday!
KEEP VOTING for him as Skater of the Year
in USFSA's 2010 Readers' Choice poll
(voting ends July 15)!

Please also vote here to tell Pepsi
that you want them to donate $250,000 to Just Push 'nPlay!
Johnny is on the board of the 'nPlay Foundation,
and this funding would help to provide physical activity
programs to nearly 20,000 kids.
Let's help make this project the top vote-getter!
(voting ends June 30)

Tubey Awards voting has ended for Be Good Johnny Weir,
but THIS WEEK ONLY you can vote here
for Johnny's Foot Massager, nominated for
Best Performance by an Inanimate Object!
It's listed among categories 13-16.
Only the top 10 vote-getters in each category
will make it to the final round of Tubey polls!

Coming all week: More exciting info about the spectacular
Crème de la Crème Runway Fashion Show on Ice
in Detroit featuring Johnny this Saturday,
Sunday, and Monday, June 26-28!

copyright 2010 / Binky and the Misfit Mimes / Lynn V. Ingogly / all rights reserved


Anonymous said...

today's blog labels RULE!! so, so, sooo good! :-)

and, OMG!!! the first BINKY!! yay!

i didn't realize there was going to be a screening of the finale too! or that Johnny's designs would be shown. augh! i wanna go, too! *sob*

i really, really hope - PLEASE, OH, PLEASE!! - that there will be some fab events after the summer for those of us who can't get time off during the summer.

please, Agentress Tara? so i can see Johnny skate and meet him for the first time and then just die of happiness?

Robin aka Princess of Johnny-Love

Anonymous said...

p.s. should we mail a copy of the dictionary to Evan?

hee hee!


Anonymous said...

Again, it's a perfect metaphor for much of what is so inspiring about Johnny: The will to rise from the ashes--more than once--and create something new and captivating and utterly brilliant.

ONce again, a brilliant quote Binky! I almost laughed out loud here in a couple of places (selling blood plasma, auctioning off kids on ebay, etc), and you made me sorry again I can't go to this thing in Detroit! Waa!

And btw, I like your title for the new Binky Lifetime Achievment award! I hope this event is everything Johnny and the organizers want it to be! I heard they are auctioning off four of Johnny's original costume designs as well with proceeds going to charity!

germansoulmate said...

"(I thoughtfully included pictures in case
Evan needs to, you know, look stuff up, like "mongoose")"

Excuse while I laugh my a** off. LOL.

And your labels again...Double-LOL.

Great blog with lots of smiles again.

Wendy S said...

Also really important to note: Johnny will be custom designing FOUR original costumes for CDLC, ALL of which will be AUCTIONED, with proceeds going to CHARITY!

How pure-awesome is THAT?! Who doesn't want one of Johnny's costumes in their HOUSE?! Maybe that he WORE!


I have a bit of a hard time envisioning how this extravaganza is going to play out, but am sure it's going to be a lotta good stuff! (Alotta Goodstuff... I think I just invented an excellent drag name)


Anonymous said...

Once again, you have nailed it. Funniest thing is about this picture, it is SO perfectly a picture of "creme de la creme", maybe that's why I've been unable to stop thinking of him in that outfit since I've decided to go to the show. It's not my fave look of his but it's awful darned precious and.... DAT ASS!! *sigh* Now I go back to writing my last will and testament, in case I DIE of happiness on Sunday :-)


Mimi Dzyacky said...

Dear Binky...It just doesn't get any better than this! You are my heart!!!

"Out of ugly...make something beautiful."

And you always do!!!!

Much love to you my dear!!

Anonymous said...

Johnny called his suit Colonel Sanders. Whipped cream or Pavlova (the dessert) it looks like. The Irish/English might describe it as clotted cream.

bsontwit said...

This event sounds absolutely fantastic! If I happen to strike Lotto I will be there, but I am so glad that Johnny will be able to combine his 2 loves-skating and fashion! All the lucky people who get to go, please give us stories pictures and video. I am hoping to make Lake Placid and I will do the same!

Also, I am so happy to hear about Johnnys foot massager being up for an award. He used to tweet me on twitter before going into hiding, maybe he will be back if he wins-good luck!!

lynette bremer said...

I am going to this amazing event too!! kudos to the planners and producers
and to johnny weir for having artistic vision and moving forth with all the
hidden gems of Detroit!!

PumaJ said...

Yesterday, I spent over an hour checking out flights from my neck of the woods on the West Coast, to Detroit. I looked at lodging near the skating rink. Then, ....I looked at my bank account and the windows I need to replace in my house, the already planned for and kinda' spendy upcoming trip to Sun Valley to see Johnny skate, the new clothes I want to buy for my grandkids (after I decided I wouldn't be auctioning them off on ebay, LOL)... Sigh. Yes, I had one of those very rare moments when I felt a wanting for more $, that what I have isn't enough:-(

In truth, I have enough for what I really need to have the $ for. My addiction to Johnny Weir and all of his fabulousness is not enough to make me spend more than I reasonably can. So... I guess I won't be attending the skate near Detroit .... tears;-)