Thursday, April 22, 2010

Vote for Johnnik. He Is Real Man.

Pssssssssst... hey you.

Yessss, you.

Vat you doink here?

Who, us? Vat arrre ve doink? Uh ... ve zhust, uh, you know, hangink out. Yesss, rrrright here. Vhere no one see us.

Ve're fine. It rrrreally comfortable here, ecktually. Although Johnnik's knees goink to give out any minute frrrom hunch down to Galina's height.

Oh, all rrright. Eef you must know, ve trrryink avoid Stars on Ice people. Their show suckink big time. They need Johnnik could help them. But he too much man for them. But not mirrracle vorker, vhich they rrrreally need. Their choreography so terrrrible! And he vould never vearink bondage gear vhile he sssskate. It so not ... vhat is term I lookink for? Oh da. "Family frrriendly."

Anyvay. Shhhhhh. No tell anyone you see usss. Nyet!

And vhy you lurkink here, anyvay?

Shouldn't you be make self useful and votink for Johnnik as "Most Addictive Reality Star" in NewNowNext Avards? Vatever that is.

Go on. Ve zhust goink to be hidink out here for a vhile. Go tveet #realityWEIR few hundrrred times. And check to sssee if Bozik tveeted yet.

Now go! Don't make me get Viktor chase you avay.

Do svidaniya!*

Please remember to keep voting for Johnny
as "Most Addictive Reality Star" in the NewNowNext Awards!
Vote here or on Twitter by constantly tweeting #realityWEIR.
Voting ends June 4, which gives us plenty of time
to get Johnny oh, say, ONE MILLION votes!

*Goodbye! Or, until we meet (again).
copyright 2010 / Binky and the Misfit Mimes / Lynn V. Ingogly / all rights reserved


Anonymous said...

Johnnik is Real Man . . . and, uh, Mongoose is Real Mongoose?


VOTE glitterbabies, VOTE!!

- Princess Johnny-Love

Anonymous said...

You are crazy if I may say so.

Thanks for making me laugh. *goes voting*

Maggie St. said...

I like the diamond shapes above Johnny's head. Rather like a WEIRd halo. An angel with sharp edges.

*MOM! They're not Communists anymore. You can stop ducking and covering now; and crawl out from under that desk*
Team Glitter: DA!
Team Orange: nah

Mimsie said...

This is hilarious! Thanks so much!!! I can hear those voices in my head!! Kudos!!!

Anonymous said...

Dearest Misfit, I was woken by my phone (which I forgot to turn off) heralding the birth of this post, since my phone receives direct messages from you on the Twitter feed. At what ungodly hour were you up writing and advocating your eternal Weir-love? I oughta make you a good tonic and perhaps throw in a foot massager to give you a good rest. And perhaps a massager for those fingers too.

Nico said...

Just last night, I was wearing my USSR t-shirt (complete with hammer, sickle and star) in yet another ode to Johnny (Will it EVER end? Nyet!!). It freaks me out a little that maybe in some small way you picked up on that. Tonight I'm going to wear another ode to Weir t-shirt just to test your psychic (telepathic? telekenetic?) abilities.

Galina is one of my favorites in his circle. I, too, aspire to be at least a tiny bit feared some day (by someone, dammit!). I wish I had her in my life constantly pushing and demanding that I live up to every damn speck of my potential. Plus, you can tell that she's secretly full of love and that she expresses it by insisting that you do her proud. LOVE it.

But, I could write an essay on every damn person in JW's life and meticulously highlight the importance of each of them. I will, of course, include you.

For you, endless admiration, as always!

Anonymous said...

Misfit, I was super busy at work all day, I seriously started to panic that a) I couldn't read your blog IMMEDIATELY, and b) I was not #realityWeir ing enough. I think I need an intervention. Please come visit me in the looney bin! -Suzanne

Anonymous said...

I LOVE GALINA. She is just like all the teachers I picked in school--I always wanted the hardest teachers and I made it my personal challenge to win them over and live up to all their demands.

Jessica Lane said...

Vinky! You not be knowink the better? Bozchik neever posting or the tweeter. He is... how you say... qviet in heart and meebe shy a bit. Meebee becuz he no skquished in woman parts in Mz. Pyatty like Jonnick. All gleeter in Mz. Pyatty the settling ant Jonnick marynade bit too lonk. Meebee. But in good vay! Like beativul cod he jest extra sparkle vile Bozchik very normal and blonde. Our gleeter meebee skarink him bit. Skarink me sometime too as vell and I be am the von throwink gleeters too! Da!

(disclaimer to Russia: Please do not send the KGB after me, I am so sorry for my mess!)

-- Jesska Lanick-ovitch-ski